Home Again
by lifeOFillusions
Summary: Larry Paul, who never is really good with goodbyes, leaves a note for Ally McBeal after she breaks up with him. What if she demands a confrontation with Larry and not accept the letter? (my version of the episode "Home Again" yep there will be larry! LONG LIVE Larry Paul!)


A/n: I do not own Ally Mcbeal. I am just a huuuge fan of Larry Paul and I am kinda super sad about what happened to RDJ in the 2000s but then again we can always rely on our imaginations and let their Larry and Ally's ship live there forever! This is my version of Home Again.

**Chapter One**

**The Note…**

_"The thing is I don't really trust myself. Look, I failed as a father, I failed as a husband. I would be lying if I said I understood what makes me fail. The biggest lie of all would be to say I never failed again."_

Larry's words last night to Ally just played in her head about the hundredth time. She was walking in the daze going to her office in the busy streets of Boston. A couple people have ready bumped into her, almost knocking her to the ground. In her normal state if she wasn't too caught up with her situation with Larry, she'd probably kick some ass for bumping into her but she was too numb to feel anything or even care so she just let them push her around.

Everything around her seemed colorless and she felt alone, someone even smiled at her and she glared at him and probably even growled at him. She was taking out whatever she was feeling to this random nice stranger. Though she doesn't know what she's feeling at the moment, it is all blurred in together that she couldn't tell what emotion is stronger. She definitely knows she's angry more than lonely. She was angry for the fact that Larry did not fight for her, and her lack of sleep from staying up all night waiting for him to come home didn't help her either. She was expecting him to leave his _goodbye note_ last night so she waited for him to face him, either to beg him to stay or call him evil names she wasn't sure yet.

She stepped into the elevator and was glad she was in it by herself. She wasn't ready to be around people at the moment. She just figured she'd hide in her office today and probably lock the door. As the elevator door shut, she started banging her head on it that when it opened she almost fell face first into her floor but she balanced right back up and straightened out her jacket.

Walking to her office, she noticed Elaine standing in the middle of the hallway with a big smile on her face. Ally wanted to smack that smile out of Elaine's face. '_No one should be happy if I feel this miserable!'_ But Ally shook that thought with a sigh. She just glared at Elaine, "What?" she said grumpily.

"Ally, Larry Paul—…" Elaine started but Ally raised a hand to stop her.

"Uh, you know, um…" Ally stuttered, "Elaine, I don't want to hear his name. And if he calls, I'm not here. Not now and not ever." She grumbled.

Elaine still smiling ignoring her snippy mood, "Well _he_ just came by to see you."

"Oh." And at that moment she perked up a little trying to hide the smile on her face, the weight on her chest feel lifted and she even thinks the room brightened up a little. "What did he say he wanted?"

Elaine nodded, "He dropped off a note." She raised an envelope she hid from behind her back.

Ally just stared at the letter blankly, her stomach fell to ground and nausea build up in her throat. The same second that she felt hope existed it left her and a cold sting of loneliness replaced it. She was devastated, her knees started shaking. All she wanted to do was fall to her knees, curl into a ball and wallow in sadness. She remembered what she told Renee last night, _"I'm gonna get a note." _Here _it _is, right in front of her, she thought she was ready for it… for the end, for his goodbye. But she wasn't, she was never ready for it. She looked at Elaine then walked away from her not saying a word.

Confused, Elaine took a second to recover from Ally's reaction. "Don't you want to open it?" she asked.

Ally stopped, slowly turning to look at Elaine and swallowed a sob that was about to escape her, "No, I—I know what it says." she sighed and walked into her office. She shut her door then slammed her body against it. She slid down unto the floor, the tears that were threatening to leave her eyes wouldn't come out, and she was staring at her window and an image of Larry standing by her desk on the night of their first kiss.

"_You might be afraid of all of this, Ally, but I'm not."_

She touched her lip and imagined it warm from his first kiss still; she could see her and him dancing that night. And then all of Larry's words from their relationship all played into her head as if he was just right there saying it to her.

"_I don't wanna go, I want you to ditch the father-and-son act, I'll declare Nelle void. We can have dinner tonight."_

"_I will come back, or you'll come back to Detroit." _

"_Did you hear what I just said? I've never loved anybody as much as I love you. And I'm only at the beginning of loving you."_

"_Does forever work for you?"_

"_I love you, Ally McBeal."_

"_I'm still capable of making a lot of mistakes Ally, but walking away from you is not one of them."_

"_I have a problem with good-byes. That dream you had where I left with a note, that'd be exactly what I'd do."_

Yes she admits that she didn't really hear him out for an explanation and broke up with him, but how can he give up so easily? He said that he wasn't afraid of this and that he wanted was staying forever. All those promises he made, now feel like they are all lies to her. She knew in her heart it wasn't lies, so why give up on her? Well, if he is giving up she wasn't letting her break it off through a note and she definitely will not let him say the last words through a note.

"I'm going to march to his office and yell at him!" she said as she stood up. The loneliness she felt seconds ago disappeared and turned into blind rage. She wanted nothing more than to scream at him and maybe throw something at him. There is a little voice in her head telling her to just let it go and walk away from it all with dignity, but she shook that voice from her head. "Screw logic!" and she stormed off her office and noticed Elaine was about to open the note.

"Ally!" Elaine jumped and put the card back in the envelope hastily, "I—"

She grabbed the envelope from Elaine, she didn't even care if Elaine tried to read the note. Her own thoughts were distracting her too much, "You—you know what Elaine it doesn't matter what this note says!" she pointed at her accusingly.

Elaine looked at her alarmingly, "I didn't read it Ally." She said defensively even though she wanted to read it really bad.

She shook her head, "I know Elaine, but it doesn't matter what it says because I don't accept this…" she started slapping the letter on Elaine's desk furiously making Elaine jump a little, "Because I don't not accept this letter as a break up!" she squealed.

Confused, Elaine narrowed her eyes. "No?"

"Excatly!" she agreed loudly that she's starting to get attention from her colleagues, Nelle and Ling walked out of their offices staring at her curiously. She raised the envelope she has and started fanning it in front of Elaine's face that she had to step away from Ally.

"Ally, are you alright?" Elaine asked tentatively. Concern showing on her face and partly amused by Ally's hysteria.

But she ignored Elaine; instead she answered Ling and Nelle's unspoken question, "La-Larry." Her voice cracked at saying his name, "Left me a note, a _note!_" her voice went an octave higher on the word _note._ "To break up with me! And he thinks I'm-I'm going to take it? No! I'm going to march to his office and demand a proper break up! I accepted his _goodbye note_ when he left for Detroit, because I loved him! So I was respecting his wishes…" she paused, "But now he has to be a grown up and break up with me face to face! I mean we are both adults! I know I can take it!" Then she stomped towards the elevators, she even pushed Mark out of her way who stumbled on the floor.

Mark stood up immediately, straightening out his jacket and looking at Elaine, Nelle and Ling curiously who wasn't paying any attention to him because they were too amused looking at Ally who was punching the button of the elevator summoning it to come out and muttering angrily about notes and Larry. "What is going on…?" he hesitated to ask, he wasn't sure if he even wanted to know.

"A deranged woman on a mission," Ling answered, she was looking at her nails then whipped her hair as she was walking back to her office, uninterested.

"God bless her," Nelle said amused.

"A woman in love," Elaine said dreamingly, giggling she added, "Or a woman out for murder." She shrugged.

The three of them was still watching Ally, they all tilted their heads slightly as they saw her pull a very stunned Richard out of the elevator, then hopped into the elevator pushing the elevator to shut aggressively.

Richard gives Ally a quizzical look as the elevator doors shut but all she got from her was an angry glare. He sees Mark, Elaine and Nelle looking at his direction. He gives them a questioning look, but Nelle just rolled her eyes at him and goes back to her office. Elaine was still smiling clearly not paying attention to him. Mark just shrugged. Gaining back his composure, he shrugs and goes to the conference room muttering about how women are crazy.


End file.
